Founded some 65 years ago, NASCAR has remained a family-owned and operated business that today claims to generate over $3 billion worth of merchandise revenue annually.  That’s a lot of mesh hats!  Don’t we all wish we had that kind of “family business” to fall into?   Believe it or not, TV ratings for NASCAR Sprint Cup racing are second only to the NFL.  About 75 million folks (almost one in three U.S. adults) regularly follow NASCAR, are YOU a NASCAR fan?  You can come out of the closet now, don’t be embarrassed.  The old way to tell was if you could rattle-off, without hesitation, the names of at least 10 current drivers.  Let’s go another way.  With apologies to Blue Collar Comedy ringleader Jeff Foxworthy’s famous redneck bit, I offer any of the 18 reasons below as a means to reveal if you’re NOT so much a fan of NASCAR racing.

 

OK, ready?  You might NOT be a NASCAR fan if…….

 

  1. You believe that Boogity, Boogity, Boogity must be the title of a soon-to-be–released Will Ferrell movie.
  2. You’re convinced The King is Elvis.
  3. You had no idea that NASCAR was actually an acronym…… because you just thought it had something to do with the type of car being driven.
  4. You assume a burn-out is something that happens after 25 years at the same job.
  5. You think a pit stop is only something your dorky Dad says he needs to make when pulling into the Interstate rest area bathroom.
  6. When a white flag is waving, you think someone is trying to surrender.
  7. You suppose a provisional is what you reach for on the tee box after you may have sliced your first drive out of bounds.
  8. Banking is just what you do at the ATM.
  9. You believe drafting is something that’s done with your buddies over wings and beer before fantasy football season starts.
  10. You think a firewall is only something that protects your laptop from spam.
  11. You seem to recall that plate racing was an act you might have seen on the Letterman Show.
  12. The groove is something you had back in your high school days.
  13. The only happy hour you’re familiar with occurs with co-workers after 5pm.
  14. You presume the pole position is………(I won’t go there!).
  15. Roof flaps only describes most of the debris you have to pick-up after a major storm.
  16. You figure a sway bar must be where they do line-dancing.
  17. Dirty air is only something you see out your window when landing at LAX airport.
  18. You had no idea that Jimmie Johnson, the ex-football coach and FOX Sports studio commentator, is also the name of the No. 48 Lowe’s Chevrolet driver and 5-time Cup Series Champion who won yesterday’s Brickyard 400.

 

Well, are you a NASCAR fan or not…..be honest??

 

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